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Why do men abuse women? What’s in it for them?
This list was generated by participants in a court-mandated batterers-intervention program in Minnesota. The facilitator asked the men what benefits they received from abusing their wives and girlfriends; the answers — unabashed and chilling — filled a 4 x 8 whiteboard.

She’s scared and won’t go out and spend money
She won’t argue
Feeling superior: she’s accountable to me
(I) get the money
Total control in decision-making
She feels less worthy, so defers to my needs and wants
(I get) a robot babysitter, maid, sex, food
Isolate her so her friends can’t confront me
She works for me
Convince her she’s nuts
Convince her she’s unattractive
Convince her she’s to blame
Get to write history
Kids on my side against her
She won’t call police

From a 1/30/14 webinar, “The Benefits of Violence: Why Give it Up?”  by Chuck Derry, of the Gender Violence Institute, sponsored by the Battered Women’s Justice Project.

Why do men abuse women? What’s in it for them?

This list was generated by participants in a court-mandated batterers-intervention program in Minnesota. The facilitator asked the men what benefits they received from abusing their wives and girlfriends; the answers — unabashed and chilling — filled a 4 x 8 whiteboard.

  • She’s scared and won’t go out and spend money
  • She won’t argue
  • Feeling superior: she’s accountable to me
  • (I) get the money
  • Total control in decision-making
  • She feels less worthy, so defers to my needs and wants
  • (I get) a robot babysitter, maid, sex, food
  • Isolate her so her friends can’t confront me
  • She works for me
  • Convince her she’s nuts
  • Convince her she’s unattractive
  • Convince her she’s to blame
  • Get to write history
  • Kids on my side against her
  • She won’t call police

From a 1/30/14 webinar, “The Benefits of Violence: Why Give it Up?”  by Chuck Derry, of the Gender Violence Institute, sponsored by the Battered Women’s Justice Project.

  1. tilsuchtime reblogged this from azmatzahra
  2. azmatzahra reblogged this from onsexandgender and added:
    Or rather, what do they think is in it for them? Via ProPublica -
  3. imemp94 reblogged this from theduplicitytimes
  4. blisslightjoy reblogged this from onsexandgender
  5. vancouvery reblogged this from onsexandgender and added:
    Violence as a means to power. Wow, not surprised. Dominating someone weaker is usually known as bullying. As usual,...
  6. darthmopar reblogged this from onsexandgender and added:
    Absolutely bone chilling.
  7. nicky2feet reblogged this from onsexandgender and added:
    Grotesque. Disturbing.
  8. mikeofthegardens reblogged this from onsexandgender
  9. bookofdoomed reblogged this from onsexandgender and added:
    (H/t BoingBoing.)
  10. womeninluxury reblogged this from onsexandgender
  11. eatergirl reblogged this from onsexandgender and added:
    #yesallwomen
  12. theduplicitytimes reblogged this from onsexandgender and added:
    #DomesticViolence #Abuse
  13. pumbly reblogged this from onsexandgender and added:
    Wow
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